One of the most contested issues in the gay world today involves the “M” word. How can monogamy (etymology = “one marriage”) apply to those people who are not even allowed by law in many states and countries to marry?
Gays and straights alike are wondering whether this word is meant for gays, or whether it is just aping the straight society. On the other hand, many others believe that monogamy can work for gay couples. If you’re considering this arrangement, you should think hardly of how you really care about the person you love.
But for those of you in less-than-ideal situations, or relationships that have gone south, online dating–even if you don’t actually use it–creates this sense of options. The internet didn’t invent options–it just brought them a little closer–made it a little easier, yes. Could someone decide to be with someone else instead of me? But what I’m realizing is that what I’d rather have is someone who chooses me and continues to choose me, regardless of the other options.
But if you were under the impression that disconnecting someone’s internet is all you need to do to keep someone from having options? Look, I’ve struggled with this myself–I worried that the more options someone had, the less likely he was to choose me. While everyone’s freaking out about online dating killing love, rarely do we realize those options can work in reverse.
The more questions you answer, the greater percentages of matches you’ll receive.
The questions are thought provoking and provocative at times, which allows you to dig deeper into a profile of a potential date to see how compatible you are in a variety of areas.
In fact, I have an online dating profile and, if you're single, you should, too. Growing up in a society that idealizes romance and promotes unattainable standards of perfection grâce à Hollywood, it's hard to come to terms with meeting someone in such a lackluster way.
Despite its prevalence among my cohort of friends and acquaintances, online dating is still taboo. Wouldn't it be so much nicer if I could tell my grandchildren that their grandfather and I met under the stars, while riding white ponies and listening to the strum of Spanish guitars... Yeah, that'd be nice, but waiting around for some dude on a pony probably isn't going to do much for my dating life. "Gather 'round, kids, and listen to how Granddad and I stumbled into each other after one too many gin and tonics! But if you're into that, it's actually much more "risky" to go on a date with some stranger who you met online. Move on to the next bleary-eyed patron or go back to your friends and have another drink.
The idea of options not only makes your partner hop to, but makes you bring it as well.(b) Say “yes” and explain to your partner that you really want to have sex with this guy just for once.(c) Say “no” and meet the guy when your partner is not around. If you answer, a, b, or c, then you’re not yet ready for a monogamous relationship.Proclaiming that you’re ready when you’re not would only jeopardize the relationship.Step 3 Once you’re on a monogamous relationship, you and your partner need to talk about your relationship regularly.